Friday, September 24, 2004
Feelings abt feelings.. at 4:26 PM
skipped the most number of lessons this week.. gosh.. it din feel as good as i tot it would. i pictured myself spending time doing my work and trying to complete those endless projects but in reality, i ended up sleeping my afternoons and nites away.. okie i shall consider this week as a retreat so next week onwards i have no excuse to skip anymore lessons..shall not hold it against myself too much..ahhaa...
times are bad.. no idea when and how it started but life just feel a little imbalanced (if u know wad i mean) or maybe unstable is a better word to describe..
hmmm generally words that describe feelings are vague words..like for example, love means love but wad exactly is love? how exactly it is to feel when u miss someone? and in fact how do you know if u miss anyone at all...and the wad abt the feeling of sian-ness? who can actually define it? is this feeling just a passing phase or is it here to stay? well i guess the nature of feelings is actually volatile..which means it changes from time to time.. say today im feeling happy but it doesn't gaurantee me happiness tom. which brings me to another point, feelings are affected, to differing extent, by events that occurs..which further substantiate the point of feelings being volatile.(kinda like a vicious cycle yeah) so unless the world can stop spinning and human can stop interacting, feelings is subjected to changes. which goes to say that the feelings of sian-ness, missing someone and love might go away..So to those of u out there thinking that true love exist and will last forever, maybe its time to rethink your thought..sure maybe it does exist but just how many of us, suckers for love, care and concern, can find it...and to those out there feeling sian and tired of life itself, pause and take a step back to see if all tt's happening now is so bad that u have to feel this way..well if it's not (which often is the case) then pick urself up from here and stop feeling the way u do..if it things are really as bad as it can get, then rejoice, for any other things that's gg to happen will just be better (since it cannot get worse than the worst).. bottomline is nothing is resistant to change, so cherish the good things now and never lose hope when times are bad =) (how self-comforting)
yeah so i guess its time i pick myself up from the bad times and look forward to the good ones.. going home soon i think.. hall bash tonite at rouge but dun think im gg..hall just feels a little different now if u know wad i mean..
Au revoir~
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